I looked up in surprise from my blue spirally plate peeking through the last of a cheesy beef cassarole.

"Really?" I asked.

"Sure...we haven't gone out in a while, and its even my treat!" Jonathan beamed at me. He was still in his black work pants and the dirty stained white button-down was crumpled next to him on the floor. His eyes were all crinkly around the corners, and he was grinning that contageous smile of his.

"Well...yah. That would be wonderful!" I tried to sound casual. After all, it *was* just a movie. No big deal.

I rose from the floor pillows and started taking dishes to the kitchen.

"Cool! I'm gonna go hop in the shower." he stoped mid-stride to the bedroom and turned around. "Hey how about we invite Tyson and Andrea?"

I concentrated on rinsing the dishes. "Who is Andrea?"

"She is this chick that Tyson is living with since he got kicked out. She's pretty cool."

I swallowed down the lump in my throat and smiled softly up at him. "Sure, that sounds fine."

At least I get to *see* him.

I finished clearing off the table and doing the dishes. There was a mumble of telephone conversation barely discernable under the rushing water I was running. By the time I was done, he was already out of the shower, dripping wet and clean-smelling.

"OK, so the movie is at 8:30...I am going to go pick them up and I'll meet you there."

I stared at him.

"What?"

He pulled a t-shirt over his head and says, "What's the matter?"

"Which theater are we going to?" I asked to give myself a moment to recover.

"The big one on Kirby."

"They don't have a car?"

"No."

"So you are going to drive half and hour out there to go get them, half an hour back down here to see the movie, and then you have to drive them back home again?"

He shruged, "Yah. They don't have a car."

"And I am going to drive myself to our date?"

He grined sheepishly, "You make it sound funny when you say it like that." He grins again, "Belen its just a movie..."

I blinked a few times. Why are you making such a big deal out of this, Belen?

"Alright. I'll get ready and meet you there."

He grabed his keys and kisses me quickly on the lips, "Cool, see ya there!"

I stared at the closed door.

:::::::::::::::::::::::

I pulled my white Tercel into a parking space near the end of the lot. I took one last look in the mirror to see how I looked, and locked the door behind me.

They were all sitting on his blue truck, bullshitting. As I walked up, Jonathan introduced me.

"Belen, this is Andrea."

We exchanged pleasantries.

We walked into the theater together like a pack of teenagers.

I haven't seen him in days and he doesn't even hold my hand. Stop being so needy, Belen.

::::::::::::::::::::::::

We steped back out into the darkness and made our way to the cars.

He opened the truck door and they began to get in.

"I'll see you at home!" he called.

"Wait!"

"What?"

"Are you *coming* home?"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Exactly what I said. You haven't been coming home til the middle of the night lately and I was *hoping* to see you tonight."

"Of course I am coming home. I just have to drop them off. Besides, you have been seeing me tonight!"

"You aren't going to stay there and drink and bullshit all night?"

"No, Belen. I am going to take them back to Andrea's and then I am coming home," edge creeping into his voice.

"Promise?" I asked, staring at him.

He smiled softly, "Yes. I'll be home."

"K. I'll see you there," I said, feeling foolish. I leaned up to get a kiss and he brushed a kiss across my forehead.

"Bye love."

The truck passed me as I was getting into my car. I heard the god awful strains of rap music he had started listening to, and Tyson leaned out the passenger window and yelled "Goodbye beautiful!" as they passed.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::

At four in the morning I bolted awake in the dimness of our room. And even as I reached for his side of the bed, I knew he wasn't there.

Go to sleep, Belen. Just go back to sleep.