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baring a soul : august 2000 touched: 08.30.00 balance. in the last months of pain and discovery, i have learned so much, and the last few weeks have brought so much of my life into balance. i have had people i love dearly take the time to express to me the depth of how they care for me. to touch me softly and say out loud what had always been unspoken. and i don't think they can ever know what that means to me. but i have also had to watch others enter very painful worlds of personal growth. with my own pain still so fresh in the back of my throat, i have felt the weight in their hearts, seen the terror in their eyes, and known the tears in their souls as they face the things that they must experience before they can get to the other side. and there isn't a moment that i don't feel them struggle, there isn't a moment that i am not quietly holding a stray piece or two until they can carry it again. and i am overwhelmingly thankful that i have my balance, that i may offer them some bits of peace in their heartache. because god knows they gave it to me when i couldn't see daylight. mairi once said that i was the most spiritual person she knew. i thought she was crazy. but i am beginning to think that maybe i am that person...because i believe that my spirituality finds its foundation in the connection i have with the people i love...and now more than ever, i feel that connection. |